I have finally after many months picked up my scrappy stuff and started getting to craft! I have completed four layouts and four cards, three of which are card kits from Shanna Vineyard! It felt so good to finally do something crafty after so long!Feeling a little better but still struggling daily with depression.









I made this card for my Nephew that just turned 13.


The 3 cards from Shanna's card kit club:









So pleased with my little man!! His teacher said Donovan was his top student and was helping to Tudor some of the kids in class that needed a little extra help. He is such a smart, loving, good young man. He has been home sick this week with Cali.


Cali had an apple for the first time and let me tell you, you better not try to take it away from her for ANY reason until she is completely done with it!!! She can give kisses on demand, say, "HI", and Ehren and Morgan seriously think she can say, "Yes".





Morgan has also been sick this week. We all are fighting something thankfully a head cold type. I went to Morgan's parent teacher conference and she is also doing very well in school. Her teacher loves how she is helpful, is friendly, and when taking her time produces good work! I have to remind her to slow down and take her time. While she was home sick, I asked her what she wants for Christmas and told her to think really hard about what daddy and I could get her special. Instead of getting an answer this is what I got... She is always such a goofball! She is our silly, wants to make you laugh, over dramatic, girl. She is such fun and likes to do crafts with me! This week we had a crop all our own. I made my cards and layouts and she made some cards. Lot of fun!!


This weekend we are planning on finishing getting some of the rooms unpacked, pulling dead plants out of the backyard(from when we moved in), and going to my brother's ordaining to become an Elder in his ward, on Sunday. Then getting ready for my MOST FAVORITE holiday of all, Thanksgiving!!!!!! Nothing is better for me thank to be surrounded by family and really good food!!!! Have a great week everyone

Can't believe my baby is 9 months!

It is hard to believe that Cali is 9 months! It does not seem like it has been that long, time is definitely flying by. She has grown so much from this chubby little 8 lbs 8oz infant to a 22 lb baby. We have thoroughly enjoyed the joy and blessings that she has brought to our home.

This photo of Cali makes me think of the song by Martina McBride "Im My Daughter's Eyes." Will try share the video at the end of the post (ok so couldn't make it happen).




There are so many things that she can do and continues to amaze us daily with her temperament, personality, and milestones. She is and still continues to be a bubbly happy baby no matter how tired she is. Cali continues to make us laugh, play, and feel young. She also makes me wish Donovan and Morgan were still this small and not the big almost eleven and nine year olds.

Who knew that babies this young (9months) could throw temper tantrum's when it normally doesn't hit until close to two years old, lol. We recently found out that if Cali doesn't want to do something she will throw her hands above her head, make a major pouty face (funny and cute I might add), throw herself backwards, and cry until she gets what she wants....don't believe me....here is proof.....

This one because I would not give her my camera to chew on.


and this one because I took her out of the bathtub when she wanted to stay in it and play.


I find it funny as well as everyone else in the family that she is doing this so early but then she has done a LOT of stuff earlier than I remember Donovan or Morgan at the actual age they should have been.

I will list her milesstones by month.
6 months- said "Mumma" for the first time and specifically reached out for me, army crawling, sat up witout help.

7 months- stand with help from the couch, crawling, stood in crib for the first time, could sit up on own from crawling, can say, "Ba ba" and reach for bottle. Got your first two bottom teeth!

8 months-Started eating chunkier baby food(3rd foods), steamed carrots and peas, finger foods and feeding yourself, Tried to stand on your own without holding anything for a split second, started saying "La La La" in a sing song way. Got your first two top teeth in!

9 months- Can stand for 15 seconds on own and slowly go to a sitting positon. Learned how to open the tupperware drawer and entertainment cabinet, discovered the neat sound of the blinds on the back door, likes to scream and make her pouty face when I do not shovel her food in fast enough, and then will do the same thing to let me know that she wants to snack on some puffs as she slaps the high chair tray saying "yumm", loves to clap especially when playing Patty Cake, likes to watch Spongebob while sitting in someone's lap, loves puppies, learned to roll a ball. Loves to sing with music, like to beat a drum, and most of all loves to sit on daddy's shoulders and chase the family around the house playing tag.

Here are some photos of Cali while playing tag:


This is her usual happy face!


Here she is going to tag me (ok really wanted the camera).



I don't know how anyone can think these precious souls are a mistake and or hurt them. They are just too precious and so much joy to have in our lives!

Halloween, mom home, and other issues....

Where do I begin about what has been going on here lately. Well, This October was a crazy and hectic month but then they all seem to be getting that way. Our mom was admitted to the hospital again during the week of Halloween with another stroke and that made Ehren's birthday and Halloween a quite somber. All of the family was a bit upset that she was in the hospital again as well as we didn't find out until later that night and she went in at 8am. While in the hospital the found a mass in her heart so she has to go back in to have a risky heart surgery to have it removed. We have been quite stress and worried about the whole situation. Thankfully, she was discharged and arrived home in time to see all the grandkids dressed and ready to go trick or treating. We all were relieved, joyous, and thankful she was able to be home.

Cali was dressed as a pink bunny, Aubrianna was Abby Cadabby from Sesame Street, Donovan was a Grim Reaper but looked more like Johnny from Karate Kid, Mimi was a Princess then switched to a bee, and Kenny actually dressed up this year as a Grim Reaper too to hand out candy.

I made a cake for hubby's birthday/Halloween that turned out great and I used vanilla pudding in between the cake layers. Everyone loved it so I will be making it again.
Hubby's birthday/Halloween cake.


The Halloween crew which finally included Kenny(my nephew who thinks he is too old to dress up, lol), Cali, Mimi, Dono, MOrgan, and Aubrianna.


Cali


Mom


Dono


Mimi


My kids



So after mom came home we had a great Halloween. The kids had fun at a haunted house around the corner from our parents and they didn't get a lot of candy since they didn't want to go to far around the neighborhood which I am thankful for, less candy for them to eat or sneak.

On a different note things here have been very difficult for me. I haven't been getting much sleep which I am sure hasn't helped but for the last two months I haven't felt myself, have been more irritable with everyone in my household, frustrated, unhappy, unhappy with myself, I have not wanted to leave the house to go anywhere, not to the store, friends, family functions,or even church, lost interest in my hobbies, friends, family even my baby,everything. Even one night last week I was seriously ready to pack up everything I have or could carry and leave my family and never come back. I wanted to so bad but just couldn't do it because I LOVE my family. Then it got worse from there that I will not go into but needless to say after not talking to anyone in my house for a whole week I decided to go to the doctors because obviously I have not been myself, I hated how I was feeling but couldn't help it no matter how hard I tried, and needed help. I went to the doctor on Friday and he said I am suffering from Postpartum Depression. I still do not feel myself but I am glad to know I am not going crazy and won't be like this forever. It will eventually go away and I will be fine. But for now I will have to take an anti-depressant, which I do NOT like taking medication so I asked for something that is low dosage and doesn't have serious or major side effects. I have felt so ashamed and embarrassed about how I have been feeling and honestly I still do. I was told it would take a couple of weeks before the medicine starts working and I seriously wish it would right away, I do not like how I am and have been feeling. I feel like such a failure as a parent and person. Add to that my family being sick.....not any better. The rain is definitely pouring here in my neck of the woods. But, I am sure the sun will come out soon it is just a matter of when.

Happy 33rd Birthday My Love!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday to my darling hubby, Ehren!!! I use to get so frustrated when we were dating that I couldn't spend one of your birthday's with you because your family always would go to the Nascar race that always happened to fall on your birthday. Fast forward 16 years later and we have had the chance to spend quite a few of your birthdays together! Many times celebrating it with a Halloween party, or just Halloween decor or a cake. This year of course will be no different...I hope you enjoy the delicious cake that I slaved over for you today!!!

For all of you that don't know. My hubby was actually DUE on Halloween 33 years ago but due to gestational diabetes he decided to come a few days early weighing in at whopping 10 lbs! I wish I had some baby pictures of him to share but sadly I don't and I am sure he loves that fact!

I am so thankful that I always had a crush on him since the 6th grade and finally my dreams came true in 9th grade when he finally asked me out! These sixteen years have been so wonderful! We have had our ups and downs but we have always made it through and share such a strong bond. I truly know that he was created especially for me and I for him. I can't imagine my life without you in it hubby! I hope you have a wonderful birthday and that all the love we have for you can be continuously felt all throughout the year! Happy Birthday!

Donovan has been doing really great in football and having lots of fun. For once he got to play another position other than linebacker, which was wide receiver and he scored a touchdown! His first this season! My feelings about his coach are still the same. I have not seen much improvement and I hope that next year (Ehren might coach)he will get a coach with patience and fairness. Donovan has two games left and though he hasn't tried the positions that he wanted to try out, I know he is enjoying himself and that is all that matters to me!




We spent this weekend visiting family for my sister's birthday, Donovan's game, then did some Halloween costume shopping. We went to Walmart and Target and didn't really see anything the kids liked so we went to the Spirit store and the kids found their costumes. Morgan wanted to be Hannah Montana again this year but I was NOT forking out fifty dollars for a cheaply made costume that I could probably even make better and I don't really sew. So she settled on a Candy Corn Witch....which looks so cute!!! Can't wait to snap some pictures of her in her costume! Donovan wanted to be the Grim Reaper so he found his robe on clearance (thats my boy) and got a few accessories to go with it, a skull sickle, some gloves, and some face paint. I think he did an excellent job staying under his budget! I did not find a costume for Cali to which I am disappointed. I was hoping to find a cute ladybug costume or something like that but could not find one. We are torn between these three costumes(below). I really like the flower costume (as I think it fits her sweet personality and would be prefect with her CHUBBY CHEEKS), also the bunny, but Ehren likes the skunk. I really really like the flower....so I think I am going to go with that one! What do you think? After I posted this I went to order the flower and it is out of stock. I am bummed but the bunny is cute too. So I think I am going to go with the pink bunny instead.







Later Saturday evening we went to Ehren's parents for our ESPN Fantasy Basketball Draft party! It was tons of fun picking our players even though I was a bit confused between the two papers I had of who played what positions, but it worked itself out! I got a really good team going and I look forward to how the season will go especially since this is my first time playing Fantasy anything. Sunday was filled with us catching up on sleep and attending church.

We weren't sure if we were even going to go to this ward that we are in now but we made the decision a few weeks ago to give it a try, so we did, and there were so many people that came up to us and said hello to us, asked us where we were living, where we moved from,invited us to join them for an activity coming up, Morgan was already invited to a birthday party, and Donovan making some new friends. I even recognized a few ladies that I befriended when we briefly attended it three years ago. We are so glad that we went and are amazed at how friendly everyone is here. Felt a great peace while at church and Cali even did very well even though it was during her nap time! Listened to wonderful talks and much needed lessons to renew my Spirit. The talks given in were on the topics of honoring the Sabbath, Not Judging others, and on being spiritually, physically, and financially prepared for anything. Three great topics that I needed to hear. I try really hard to not do things on Sunday and just spend time with family, nap, and so forth, but I could do better. I try very hard to not judge anyone and sometimes I have to remind myself that I do not like to be judged especially since I am quiet, but the talk also reminded me not to judge my children too harshly when they do something wrong. I need to give them room to grow and help guide them in the right direction. The preparedness talk is one thing that I seriously need to heed! I need to get into shape, need to be spiritually prepared, and get a few more things financially and food wise ready. I love how most Sunday's the talks are things I have been thinking that I need to work on but don't do enough, or have to do with something that has happened to me the previous week, or something someone mentions briefly. Definitely feeling refreshed!

My dear friend Christine took our family photos last month and I am so thankful and LOVE the photos she took of my family! Thanks Christine, I greatly appreciate it and appreciate you! I did add the kids names to their photos, not sure if I like the date or if I should just add their age. It was SO hard for me to choose my favorite of each one of the kids or Ehren and I, as all of the photos turned out excellent. Better than I imagined and completely worth the wait!!!!! So without further delay...here they are!

Am I getting sick too or is my head spinning from all that has gone on in the last month?
With the move and my Grandmother Jo in the hospital to unclog her throat arteries, then my father for a bad heart and breathing trouble, the my Grandma Jeanne in for a pace maker problem, then again the next week for catching a terrible virus, then Ehren's mom in for a stroke on the 19th, my darling niece Mimi tearing some ligaments at soccer on Saturday, and today my dad goes in for an Angioplasty, my head is spinning! I am going tonight to keep an eye on my father after his procedure today. All these tugs at my heartstrings really has left me to think about things and puts morality into perspective for me. I go about day to day rushing here or there or sometimes nowhere, taking care of Cali and sometimes getting frustrated because I don't know what she wants or why she is fighting her naps. Then rush to get the kids, pick up Ehren, and then come home to rush dinner, homework, baths, tuck the kids in hastily, and rush to get as many things done around here I can while it is quiet and I have Ehren to help keep me on track. All while forgetting that the most important things are my children, what I am teaching them, doing things with them, making small talk with them as well as the much needed talking as they are approaching pre-teen years, and I wonder what legacy am I leaving with them. Am I leaving them with memories or empty spaces in time where all they are going to remember is us rushing around somewhere and not doing anything worthwhile to them.

Conference talks this weekend really struck home with me. I could not help but feel that these talks all were pointed at me. All the while asking myself if I am being Christ like at all times, if I am forgiving my children after they make repeated mistakes, if I am teaching them all that is right and not just letting them choose for themselves along with the ever deteriorating moral in the world, if I am paying attention to what matters most? I am doing it a little but not enough. I am not taking the time out of our rushing around to talk with them about all the important things I want them to know, they need to know, and I would like them to know. I do talk with them about some of the things but not enough. I need to improve. I love how there is always room for improvement and to raise my bar. I need to focus on this in the next few months!

I am always reminded what I must do everyday and I am glad that I love my kids so much that I was able to break the chain of abuse that I grew up with and make sure that I am giving my kids what I didn't have, again this area can be improved upon but I am happy that I can see joy in their eyes. My heart rejoices that I can see them getting along most of the time and though they bicker here and there, it is not the full on physical fighting that was in my childhood home. I rejoice seeing them giggle together at something I being the adult thinks is not too funny. I love seeing them try their hardest to make Cali laugh and though it frustrates me to constantly tell them when they are sick to leave Cali alone, seeing them talk to her, kiss her, hug her, and smother her makes me happy.

Last year was a really hard time in school for Donovan. I was on him a lot about his homework, projects, lack of enthusiasm, lack of effort, to complete or turn in his work. After constantly getting frustrated at him when I would take his teachers word over his as he had a bad problem with honesty last year. To seeing him this year with a gentler, more compassionate teacher, one that encourages, instead of enforces, has brought much happiness back into Donovan's world. He made Honor Rolls this semester. I have to admit I was a bit concerned because Mr. F (his teacher this year)has not sent him home with homework yet this year. From what he has told me as well as Donovan everything is done in class and hands on. So I tried my best to believe him and not pester him and wait and see. I am so glad I did because a lot and I really mean A LOT of contention has left our home thanks to this year's teacher. I am so pleased with him. I knew he was capable of it as he has always been a A and B student since kindergarten until last year. I am glad to see it was because of the teacher and not my son (well yes he didn't try) but I guess it all fall down to was that teacher the right one for Donovan....no I don't think so. But I am so happy and pleased. He has a very high IQ and I know that he gets bored easily but I can't tell him how happy I am to see he is where I knew he could be!!!!



Most of my house is sick. I am seriously knocking on wood and praying that Cali and I do not get sick. It is not a terrible sickness just a minor cold as Donovan and Morgan still have the energy to want to play during the day. But as usual each one develops different symptoms first. Morgan started with a sore throat for two days with no fever. Then came the cough and then the fever yesterday. Donovan started out with the fever, then got the cough, and now has a sore throat too. Ehren whom rarely gets sick woke up this morning dizzier than ever and sick to his stomach. So I am seriously enforcing the hand washing to my kids dismay, and Clorox wiping everything down and as I said trying to keep them away from Cali. I for one am taking my vitamins as well as Acidophilis just in case Ehren's stomach bug decides to try and attack me. That is one bug I don't want! I don't like to expel at all and so I refuse to or to even catch that bug.

Cali today started eating some baby graham crackers. I did not know they would be so messy! She love the Veggie Dip chee-to puff looking things and now loves these cookie or cracker things. So much that she had already eaten six of them in less than ten minutes! This girl can eat like I have never seen...ok well I can eat pretty good but not as a baby! She eats four tablespoons of baby cereal, two tubs of food (a veggie and fruit), and 4oz of formula at breakfast every morning and then repeats that much for lunch, and then dinner. With 6oz bottles in between those meals and she eats every three hours still. She went to the doctors on Thursday to be weighed and she is a whopping 21 lbs and 1.75 oz!!!!!! I don't even think Donovan or Morgan weighed that much at a year old! Oh...but she is so sweet, loving, cuddly, calm, and happy!!! All rolled into this darling butterball!!! Is she not the cutest?



Well, since my head is still spinning from everything I better go nap while Cali is down and then get ready to doctor my dad through the night!

Happy Belated Birthday Morgan!

Happy Birthday to you!!! So happy that you blessed our family with your presence nine years ago on the 27th of September! I love you so very much! (Sorry no baby pictures, they are all buried in a tub in the garage.)

I remember it like it was yesterday.... being really worried of another baby being pre-term and having to go on bed rest at 26 weeks for the same symptoms that I had when I had complications with Donovan. I was put on Terbutalin and it so far seemed to be working and keeping me from going into labor that I made it to 33 weeks and I was thankful. I was feeling relieved and yet like I said worried. I took my last pill on my 21st birthday which I spent in bed. I was on serious bedrest, I couldn't get out of bed for any reason other than to go to the bathroom. We temporarily loaned our second vehicle to my wonderful sister-in-law Marianne since I wasn't going to be using it, so she could pick up Donovan every morning for us and watch him for us, like she offered. It was very kind of her and yet very lonesome for me even though I wouldn't have been able to keep up with him.

As I was no longer able to take anymore medicine, I was wondering when I would go into labor. Well, two weeks after my birthday, I woke up at 5am with severe back pain. So painful that I couldn't catch my breath and I knew that this would be the day she arrived. I got in the shower to get myself ready as the back pains were not as close as the doctor told me to watch out for. So as I got ready the pains were getting more intense and so we were out the door by 7am. Ehren drove crazy which of course was probably because of me, which was really unusual for him. Every bump and slam on the breaks hurt and at one point he had to slam on the breaks to stop in order to not hit the guy in front of us who had come up to stopped traffic. Needless to say, I thought I was going to have Morgan right there on the freeway and I was scared out of my mind. We had almost an hour drive through rush hour traffic to Good Samaritan Hospital. We made it there by 8:30 which actually took us an hour and a half to get there. I get strapped into the monitors and get checked, I am dilated to a five and so they order the Epidural for me. I get the Epidural @ 9 and have to wait to dilate to a 10. The doctor comes in at noon and tells me that the Epidural slowed my labor down so they are going to give me Petocin to speed it back up. So I get that terrible stuff and start dilating again. All the while only half of my lower body was numbed from the Epidural, just like with Donovan's labor. It hit 1pm and I was physically ready to get the baby out.I was ready to no longer be pregnant, ready to no longer feel any pain shooting through the entire left side of my body at each contraction, and so very ready to meet this little girl that I had spent the previous eight months trying to picture. Trying to see if she will look like her daddy with those beautiful yellow green eyes, the dark brown hair, and olive skin. Easy as pie Morgan arrived at 1:09pm. So fast that none of our family had made it up to the hospital in time. She was the cheesiest baby I have ever seen which I have seen a lot thanks to TLC's Baby Stories. She was a bit jaundiced so had to go under the billiruben light for a few hours. She wasn't at all what I pictured. She had strawberry blonde hair which turned blonde, jaundiced skin which eventually turned fair, and blue eyes which did thankfully turn into almost the same green that her father has, and of course beautiful. So She was a happy and sweet baby. Always loving to cuddle, sleep, and sing.

As she grew she loved all things she was never unhappy, she especially loved her big brother, books, her dress up clothes, My Little Pony, of course sweets, and Care Bears. I still can't remember if dada or pretty was her first word, j/k, it was dada but as a toddler all she would say was "Pretty?" She loved to dress herself in her clothes and then add tons of her dress up stuff and ask, "Pretty?" It was so cute, I think I have a video of it somewhere but don't know where as we have moved. She still to this day asks if she looks pretty when she is going somewhere, likes to sing, dance, do any kind of craft, draw, and color. She still adores her brother though he has gotten to the, ugg your annoying stage. She now instead of making sure he is happy and that they color, play games or puzzles together, she likes to annoy him, pester him, drive him up the wall, and yet still loves to play board games and such with him even if he doesn't.

I am so very thankful for this wonderful girl that joined our family nine years ago. She has such a sweet spirit, is pretty easy going, and yet has just a hint of a temper. She has been a blessing to our family and still continues to do so to this day. She has now hit that point in life where she doesn't want to be a little girl anymore. She is really into fashion and clothes, wants to wear all the cool fashion jewelry though she is allergic to all of it she can only wear gold,is very stubborn when it come to eating(this girl practically eats nothing), and can throw a major fit if she doesn't get what she wants, and loves to try and be mommy to her new baby sister. It is all so worth this precious angel that I love so much! Happy Birthday baby!!!!


This year for her birthday we didn't plan it out too well as we just moved and had Great Grandma, Grandpa T, and Grandma R in the hospital within days from each other, right around her birthday. So at the last minute we threw a small pool party for her girl friends from school. Then as she has been asking for the last two years to have her hair permed, Grandma R made that happen. She was so happy! I kept her home on her birthday(27th) and took her to the salon to have her hair permed. I didn't really like how it turned out because it looked like it either didn't take or wasn't on her hair long enough. Either way she still looked cute. But, we agreed to see how it looked the next day. By the time I picked her up from school she barely had any curl at all to her hair. So I took her back to the salon to have them look at it and find out what they could do. I wanted it re-done but knew it could possibly damage her hair. So we went back Tuesday evening and they decided to go ahead and re-do her hair as it definitely didn't take. So this time since the manager used two bottles instead of one like the hairstylist did. She said Morgan had way to much hair to use one bottle. After an hour and a half Morgan's hair was finally curly like we both pictured. A few strands weren't as curly as the rest, in the back but she was happy and that was all that important to me.

Here she is on her birthday after her hair was permed the first time.


Here she is Tuesday when it was re-done. Such a beauty!!